Same Old 🙂
by Rabbi Mordechai Rhine
Yakov had to flee from his parent’s home. His brother Esav was angry with him and wanted to kill him. So flee he did.
The Torah records the event. “And Yakov left Be’er Sheva, and he went to Charan.” Rashi asks: Why does the Torah have to tell me that Yakov left Be’er Sheva- Let it just say that he went to Charan? Rashi answers that the Torah wishes to highlight the significance of Yakov leaving Be’er Sheva. “When a Tzaddik (righteous person) is in the city he is its glory, glow, and pride. When he leaves, the city’s glory, glow, and pride, are diminished.” Therefore the Torah specifically wants to record the significant and sad moment that Yakov left Be’er Sheva.
Interestingly, although the Torah values the Tzaddik and declares that he is the glory, glow, and pride of a city, not everyone sees the value in such people. The Talmud in Sanhedrin (100a) records, for example, that some people teased and said, “Of what value are Torah scholars? Have they ever declared a raven to be kosher? Have they ever declared a dove to be non-kosher?” In the minds of these teasers the righteous people were too predictable. They can’t find anything novel that these people have ever done.
Particularly noteworthy is that the Talmud does not respond to these teasers. To this great “insult” of “same old” the Talmud does not offer a response. Rabbi Ahron Kotler explains that it is as if the Talmud is smiling “uh-huh”, and saying, “That is precisely true. It is through accuracy, and through reliable transmission of the tradition, that the Torah scholars make their primary contribution.”
This concept that “same old” is not necessarily an insult, is not limited to Torah scholarship. Actually it is a healthy attitude for life. People sometimes wonder about things that are “same old”. Often the correct response is, “Yes, it is same old. But that is truly monumental.”
I once encountered a written interview of a certain celebrity in which he explained why he was divorcing after 20 years of marriage. He was asked, “Was anything wrong?” He responded, “No, nothing was wrong. It’s just that it was always same old.”
He was asked if he had children from this marriage. He responded, “Yes. Two lovely children.” When he was asked about his relationship with his spouse. He said, “It’s okay.”
The interviewer then asked about the family. He replied, “Oh, they are nice people. It’s just that it’s all just same old.”
I thought to myself: What the Talmud say about such a person? It would probably go something like this. “Fool! What you consider an insult and disappointing is actually a significant accomplishment. What you call, ‘same old’ is quite monumental. It is all that has happened in 20 years of marriage. It is the children, the family, and many wonderful relationships.”
Sometimes in parenting as well we may experience “same old” syndrome. The days, months, years, may seem somewhat repetitive. It seems like it is all about school, homework, meals, and bedtime. And then it starts again. Yet, if we stay on track the results are monumental.
Rabbi Mendel Kaplan was fond of describing life as a piece of chewing gum. It has a little flavor… but mostly it is chew, chew, chew. “Same old” may be less exciting than you were expecting, but if you do it with diligence you will get to smile – as the Talmud smiles at this “insult”- because in the end you will have something wonderful to show for your efforts.
© 2014 by TEACH613™
Nice message, Rabbi Rhine!
RMR: great to hear from you;
glad you enjoyed!
Yes; I think even when things seem dull, there is progress because life can only move forward; it cannot stand still. We can either appreciate the newness in every moment or be dragged along and suffer through every experience.