The 30 Day Jewish Marriage Challenge

© 2021, Rabbi Mordechai Rhine ~ RMRhine@teach613.org

 

Day 1: Resolve to say nothing negative relating to your spouse today.

Day 2: Do an unexpected gesture to your spouse as an act of kindness.

Day 3: Buy your spouse something that says, “I was thinking lovingly about you today.”

Day 4: Contact your spouse sometime during the day and ask how he or she is doing, and if there is anything you could do for them. The goal is to treasure what he or she is thinking and what is meaningful to him or her.

Day 5: Resolve to start addressing one thing that your spouse is uncomfortable or irritated about you.

Day 6: Choose to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation.

Day 7:  On a sheet of paper, write out positive things about your spouse. At some point during the day, pick a positive attribute from the list and thank your spouse for having that characteristic.

Day 8: Share with your spouse how glad you are about a success he or she recently enjoyed.

Day 9: Think of a way to greet or do something for your spouse today to reflect your love for him or her, and then do it with a smile and enthusiasm.

Day 10: Anticipate a need that your spouse will have today, and try to address it.

Day 11: Demonstrate love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between you and your spouse.

Day 12: Establish healthy rules of engagement and resolve to abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.

Day 13: Choose to neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse and enjoy.

Day 14: Pray for a specific area in which you desire Hashem to intervene in your spouse’s life and in your marriage.

Day 15: Determine to guard your spouse’s secrets and pray for him or her.

Day 16: Take Hashem at His word  that marriage is good, and trust Him. Ask Hashem  for the strength and grace to succeed in marriage.

Day 17: Choose to be committed to love even if your spouse has lost most of their interest in receiving it.

Day 18: Remove anything that is hindering your relationship, stealing your affections and turning your heart away from your spouse.

Day 19: If there is anything you haven’t forgiven in your spouse, forgive it today.

Day 20: Ask Hashem’s forgiveness for your areas of wrongdoing. When appropriate, ask forgiveness from your spouse.

Day 21: Acknowledge to your spouse an area in which you are sorry for expecting too much.

Day 22: Take a physical  step towards fulfilling a need that your spouse has now.

Day 23: Pray for your spouse by name and for his or her needs.
Day 24: Ask Hashem to reveal anything in your own heart that is threatening oneness with your spouse. Commit to make your marriage the top priority over every other human relationship.
Day 25: Tell your spouse that you desire to include him or her in your upcoming decisions.

Day 26: Verbally praise your spouse for when he or she demonstrated proper character.

Day 27: Find a marriage mentor. Ask Hashem to direct your decisions and perspective.
Day 28:  Commit to a daily schedule of Torah study.

Day 29: Spend time in personal prayer; write a letter of commitment and resolve to your spouse.

Day 30: As life partners, discuss priorities with your spouse, and resolve to live life to a higher calling.